In Trakai + A Real Life Renaissance Festival

Trakai is the historic capital of Lithuania, it contains many medieval structures, including: the lake castle, a treasure vault, and a bunch of dorks in tights.

A brief history of Trakai...no I'm not actually going to go into feudalism and shit here, go read it yourself.

If you held a Renaissance festival in a real castle, year round, and took it very seriously, you would have Trakai. Pure. Awesomeness.

I went with Linas and Remas, and yes they are exactly as much fun to hang out with as it is to say their names together.

We spent the majority of our day wandering through the castle and it's various museum-like rooms of armor, treasure, and creepfully knowledgable tour guides. (Yes I know that is not a real word, but it should be.)

Remas and Linas were both very familiar with the place and knew where to go and what to see. I, however  was like a kid in a medieval armor-and-treasure-candy-shop.

They put up with my enthusiasm with the patience of mountain goats (I don't know if mountain goats are actually patient, but it seemed like a good time for a folksy descriptor here).

And now...a photographic interlude.

Lithuanian Chads do not mix well with boating

Which way to the gift-shop? 

Kind-of reminds me of the painting of Vigo in Ghostbusters II

Shiny

Not creepy. At. All. 

And then...

I found the tattoo I had been looking for

I Thought that this trip would give me some inspiration for the tattoo I wanted to get to commemorate my trip and whatnot (I say whatnot with the highest regard for all the whatnot that took place here) and I was right.  The Vytis is the historic and iconic protector of Lithuania, he is the coat of arms for the country as a whole. The name means "chaser" he was not a conqueror but a defender, and would chase the enemies of Lithuania to the borders...and no farther.

Just a few smoking accessories

 We did wander over to the jousting grounds and the historic re-enactments were a sight to behold. Men in tights are the coolest, no?

In closing I would just like to say thank you to the Tartars for their strict religious beliefs and delicious food. For without you Trakai would have been just another castle.